Posts Tagged ‘funny’

I recently had the honor of being interviewed about my life and my novel, The Deep Freeze. The opportunity to share some of my goals and accomplishments was very exciting. My humor also manages to sneak its way in there so feel free to read and laugh!

Have a sci-fi day! ~ TLH


Aliens, Brains and Migraines

By: Tammy Holloway

                Cue the music…Theeeeere’s a pain in my brain and I call it a migraine but I think it’s an alien monster. With this pain in my brain I go hugely insane so I must get rid of this monster.

                I’m a writer. Yep, plain and simple. “Norf du spak! Norf du spak!” Oh yeah, before I forget, I have an alien in my brain and he pretty much decides everything. Norf du spak…that means “I’m your master”. I just go with it since there isn’t a whole lot I can do about him. It makes for interesting writing though I must say. I write science fiction and love the visions I get thanks to Al. Al isn’t very creative for a name but hey, I didn’t choose to have him in there.  I got tired of yelling “Shut up alien!” and “Stupid alien!” so I just shortened it. He seemed to like it because the first time I called him Al I got a nice gentle squeeze to the brain.

                Al hates most things so I generally live with a migraine almost every day at some point or another. Berkle smut almost always means a big one is coming so I make the most of my day with relaxation music and a hot bath.  Before I realized what berkle smut meant, I continued my day as normal. It wouldn’t matter if I was in the middle of writing a really great story, the pain would come with such intensity that I would have to put the pen down. I always hated trying to remember what I was going to write next and Al would laugh and access my memory bank with some really off the wall material. I don’t know how many times I started writing whole paragraphs before I realized what was going on. “Very funny Al!” I would say in a louder than normal tone. Wreek lum sten fo ler ler. Kimp san wen voc romp. Dok la.&*YOYIH NUUIY*YYYOUPIOJO.

                “AL!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stop it!” Anyway, it’s time to feed Al. I can forget about getting anything hfskslend…normal written until he is happy again.

Have a sci-fi day everyone! ~ TLH

Jomon Anto gave me permission to share these photos that he created using Photoshop. I laughed so hard I cried!
I love to make people smile – especially on a Monday – so here you go:

I call this girl a Drog….Ain’t she purdy?


….and in the monin’ I’m makin’ waffles! Very small waffles – Prairie Donkey


Sorry guys…This one gets the name “Burt”. Don’t ask me why. It just got stuck in my head. Be afraid…Be very afraid!

I’m waiting for this thing to say in a raspy voice Hey! Got a cigarette?


Now this is one bad A dude here. We’ll just call him Fly….or Chuck Norris..Either one will work.


Squog! She’s a keeper. Imagine the money that would be saved on dog food!

The first thing that came to me….after I stopped laughing so hard, was to make a fairy tale story out of them. Their leader? Fly of course, with Drog working as a guard for the princess Squog. Burt tries to kidnap princess Squog and Prairie Donkey is her knight in shining armor…very small armor. 😉

Have a wonderful sci-fi day my friends! ~ TLH

One of my adventures involved starting my own radio show. The Puppy Whisperer is a show designed to help dog owners with some of the more difficult times in a dog’s life. From tricks like “how to train your dog to get you a beer” to “potty training” – Each episode offers free tips to guide you into a happier life with your four-legged friend. It was another form of writing for me, but also a way to fill the need to help others. This happens to be one of the more popular shows lol!
Listen to
internet radio with The Puppy Whisperer on Blog Talk Radio

Here is Daisy after she just learned the trick at 5 months old:

Here is Buster after the trick had been perfected:

Imaginary Friend

By: Tammy Holloway

Robot Sam Liked Monster Jam.

He hid in my pocket all day.

I played with him at night when I got real scared and he stood six feet tall in my bedroom.

He had robot arms with funny looking hands and he had one wooden eye cause he lost it.

He said he blew up and he stood by a tree so he grabbed up some wood and he made it.

His body was square with wiry hair. It was fun in the dark cause it glowed.

We played hide and seek and I always found him cause he gave himself up with his light.

The sounds were like “beep” and “buzz buzz” or “bleep bleep”.

He talked all the time but he sounded the same. Even his laugh was so plain.

Robot Sam was my friend and I’ll love him to the end.

Time for bed cause it’s Friday and then it will be Saturday.

That means time for another Monster Jam with Sam!

Good night.


Have a sci-fi day everyone! ~ TLH

So this picture kind of describes what my thumb feels like….I really am a complete goofball. So I was doing dished and used my thumb nail to scrape of a noodle that was stuck to the bottom of the pan right? Well, that was dumb. The noodle came off alright. Right in between my thumb nail about half way through! Something so stupid and I woke up in the middle of the night with a throbbing thumb. I carried a wash cloth and an ice-cube to bed and that helped me get back to sleep. This morning I tried epsom salt. I still have spaghetti up in my nail so I was hoping to draw it out. I tried to take a close up picture of my nail and that was a complete fail! 

The kicker is, I just finished finals and have a few free days to write……Stupid spaghetti! Stupid dishes! Stupid Tammy trying to use my own stupid nail to scrape stupid noodles off a stupid pot! So with that said, I am just glad it was not a headache. I will take a chainsaw to my leg before a migraine any day! A noodle in my nail is not so bad:-p

Have a sci-fi day everyone! TLH

I discovered this site from a friend on Google+ and thought it was cool. You draw a stick man and watch him come to life with interactions throughout the video. If you’re bored give it a try. I laughed pretty hard during the whole thing:-)

Here is a picture of my actual stick man. Aren’t I quite the artist? lol!

Blank Page “Write”?

Posted: October 18, 2011 in life
Tags: , , , ,

It’s cool to look at. I stared at it for a good while. It’s a good way to think about…well, whatever I guess. I am actually sitting next to my crazy husband and he laughed at me. He said “why are you staring at a blank page?” BINGO! Yeah so just go with it okay? I love writing. That is what I do, that is what helps me relax, and it saves my husband from hearing me blabber about nothing for hours…lol!

Writing is an interesting beast. She waits in our head and explodes when we least expect it. If we are without writing tools, we may lose it and forget it at a later time. I typically write when my husband is at work but today I spent a wonderful afternoon with him. We travelled down to Atlanta to pick up some garage doors. We love our “road time”. The conversation is anything but boring, as usual. Of course we have to stop half a dozen times because I have the bladder of a child. HA! So today I get to write in the evening to spill all of my joy onto this computer.

I did have to make a quick stop at the local grocery store. I tend to strike up a conversation with the cashier when checking out and today was no different. We were all laughing before it was all said and done. The conversation was about men, bacon, Home Depot, belts, wallets and what to get a man for his birthday. Somewhere in there it was brought up how many alcoholic drinks have bacon in them now… EWE!!!!! I mentioned chocolate bacon and things just got interesting form there. So yeah…never a dull moment. People really must think I’m crazy..but hey, they laughed and that’s awesome!

Now I sit and stare at a full page of words. I am content:-) Have a wonderfully awesome sci-fi evening folks! TLH

Never a dull moment in our lives…that’s for sure! Nathan looked at me yesterday and said; “Your next blog should be The ‘Write’ Way to Spend the Weekend”…so here it is. He is right because we always have something going on that could be shared so you all can laugh with (or at) us;-) As long as you laugh…I’m good. lol!

So what did we do? Hmmm. Well, it started out with the usual – dinner and video game play. 2 systems, 2 TV’s, online playing Two Worlds II together. I play a warrior (I think). I have a big giant sword and lots of armor so whatever that is. Nathan is playing a mage. He is all decked out in some weird-looking robe and a wizard hat casting spells as we venture through the game. I favor the heal spell the best since I really suck at this stuff and he can heal me….all the time. He also summons weird-looking creatures. They get in the way and Nathan laughs at me because I am attacking them instead of the bad guys. Yeah, you have to see it to understand.


We play together because we enjoy doing things together. It doesn’t matter if I am not that good or he is not that interested. It is the time we are together and how we spend that time.

We watched the movie Benchwarmers. I never watched it and Nathan insisted I see it. HAHAHAHAHA! I am so glad he did because I laughed and laughed…yet appreciated the message it had in there about bullying. That movie should be re-released with all the crap that’s going on now. John Heder is too funny in it!

Wal-Mart trip!! Woohoo! That is a treat around here. We are 30 minutes from any Wal-mart so we only go about once a month. Can you imagine? Once a month! lol! We headed on over to the Wal-Mart in Murphy, NC (we do have options…3 actually lol). We went to the vision center and left without buying a thing. How does that happen? (Finding out how much new glasses were, that’s how!)

Did somebody say Home Depot? Well now, things are getting way out of hand here. Our weekend is heatin’ up isn’t it? lol! Our floor is falling out from under our bed. Yeah, great job to the person that designed this house. They deserve the “I’m an idiot” award. Visuals please….We’ve went through every scenario and they are not pretty so off to throw more money away. Woohoo! $30 worth of plywood and we were back in business…..or were we?

Rotten floor = moisture; Moisture = mold; Huge king sized log bed = wood; Moisture + wood = HOLY CRAP THAT STINKS!

Yep – we had to pull the entire bed apart, take it outside, cut 6 inches off the bottoms of each leg…Now I don’t have to jump to get in bed thank you very much (which should bring to mind a visual of the rotten floor giving way), seal the feet so it doesn’t happen again and put 2 coats of paint on the whole bed frame…all while dealing with gnats all over the place. Now doesn’t that sound like fun? Well, to these two crazy people it was! We are creating memories every day…and unique ones at that.

My husband, my best friend, my hero:-)

The fireplace was roarin’, hot chocolate was brewin’ and the couch awaited us for cuddle time;-)

Happy Monday everyone!

Have a sci-fi day! TLH